Double-crossed. My own words and thoughts were holding me captive but I didn’t know it. Somehow, I had correlated my thoughts about as truth. Never once did I challenge their validity. They were locked in my mind, feeding my soul. And for years, the thought of having little value or nothing meaningful to offer those around me had plagued me. And for years I allowed these thoughts to roam freely in my mind as if these were the truths that I lived by; owning them as if they rightfully belonged to me.
What I didn’t realize then was how much these thoughts had seeped into my personal and professional life, robbing me of God’s intended purpose for my life and substantially limiting my potential. How thoughts of uselessness had rendered me useless. That thoughts of not having anything to offer, impeded my ability to offer what God had placed on the inside of me that was intended to share with others. Because I hadn’t understood the real truth within, I could not offer what I didn’t know I had. This lack of knowledge rendered me stagnant and still; unable to move forward in the things of god; stealing my productivity.
But as I began to understand what God did when He created me and how my life was meant to be more than what it currently was, ever so slowly — the freedom from which I was bound inextricably to, shackled with, let go of its grip. I was beginning to experience the love of God in such an intimate way that revealed His mind of intent. Through my experiences, I learned that an Awesome God did not make junk; and that I was free to become the woman that God whose value was far above rubies; not the woman whom my mind had created. I am indeed a precious soul in the heart of God. I am precious because God made me just like Himself. He created me to love and to be loved. I have value because God gave me true value on the inside.
As the Word of God revealed truth about His value on my life, I gradually succumbed to the knowledge that God actually had the right of way in shaping me to be His valuable creation.
Sometimes, I still have to tell myself to let go of unproductive, unfulfilled thoughts and if I don’t watch out, I will find myself back in the ring duking it out with myself.
But I am so glad that just as negative untruths can steal or impede our destiny, righteous thought can make us free. And knowing who we are — the real us in the inside — no matter what anyone else says about us — is the difference between hope on this side of heaven and hopelessness and despair.
Women in Purpose 